Can't Top The Lindy Hop

Can't Top The Lindy Hop

This week marked the first anniversary of my love affair with Lindy Hop. And as all relationships it has had its ups and downs.  It started mildly enough one Tuesday evening as I shyly stepped into a basic series class.  Lindy hop was interesting and unassuming, but seemed to hold my attention.  Another encounter the next week continued to pique my interest, but I was awkward and reluctant at our meetings.  As the weeks went on, the dance became more attractive and exciting and I was in the throws of first love.  Friends and mentors encouraged me and I found that I had to experience the joy of Lindy on a more frequent basis. It was my first thought in the morning, my last thought at night, and haunted my dreams.

There were many moments of frustration when my feet and brain did not live up to the expectations my new addiction placed on me.  But the exhilaration when one of those moves clicked outweighed the negative.  Then one day, the brain, body, and heart seemed to all connect and I had found my soul mate. The adrenalin rush was nearly blinding.  I had found acceptance and freedom and a place to express myself.  I had found my happy place and that happiness permeated the rest of my life.

But, it did not take long for the passion to wane. The analytical me started thinking about what other people would think.  This was, after all, an unconventional affection.  I started comparing how I related to Lindy with how others related with it and became jealous of what appeared to be better relationships.  I got a little clingy and became dissatisfied with how the dance was controlling me.  There became more evenings of just not feeling that joy that had initially been so common.  The positive growth that I had seen in me because of this new love was fading.  The desire for that first love feeling was still there, but too many conflicting thoughts were blocking it.

It was time to stand back and reevaluate the relationship, and where it was going. Would I continue this affair with commitment or as a casual fling?  It was necessary to go back to the basics; to remember the initial feelings and qualities that made me fall in love.  When I entered into the pursuit of Lindy Hop, it was with no expectation, except that I would learn to dance it.  It was for me and me alone.  And what it gave me was the chance at the freedom to be an individual, to dance to a different drummer if I chose, and without judgment. Lindy had never asked more of me than what I wanted to put into the relationship, and through that had given me immeasurable joy. It had been me that had put the unnecessary expectations on the relationship.

The interaction that I, that we each have, with the dance is totally unique and cannot be compared to that interaction anyone else has.  We cannot be judged as right or wrong when there are no rules in the art. But we can appreciate the enjoyment that each individual derives in their own way from the symbiosis. And now, after much reflection, I choose to continue this affair with joy, gusto, and freedom, committed to this love for as long as I can dance.